Ok, so I'm going to be completely honest. The last 2 days have been rough. I'm almost afraid to type that I have BOTH kids asleep right now for fear that one of them will wake up as soon as I type it. It seems the "honeymoon stage" may be over. Evan is not enjoying sharing the spotlight with his little sister and is starting to have behavior issues. And little Zoe has definitely been giving us some fits with her sleep schedules and unhappy moods (hence the lack of "schedule" with her sleep). These are the kind of days that make me second-guess our decision for me to stay home with my littles. But a good night of sleep last night, encouragement from my hard-working-so-I-can-stay-at-home husband whom I love so very much, lots of praying, a conversation with my mom, and a few minutes reading through one of my highlighted and scribbled in all-time favorite books (The Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson) have made me realize I'm EXACTLY where He is calling me to be. Home with these 2 precious children God has given to us. And blessed beyond measure.
Don't let their smiles and sweet innocent faces fool you- they have both been giving me a run for my money the last couple of days! But oh how I pray that I always try to keep things in perspective. Yes, there are many days when it seems like all the changing diapers, constant demands for my attention, endless amount of dishes and laundry, constant picking up of toys, household chores, and lessons in discipline are so very insignificant. And I know that there WILL be more of these days.
I ran across one of my favorite quotes in The Mission of Motherhood this afternoon: "Choosing to be a servant-mother means willingly giving up myself, my expectations, and my time to the task of mothering- and choosing to believe that doing so is the best use of my time at that moment. It means that, by faith, I have already made a decision to make myself available in the routine tasks and myriad interruptions of daily life because I believe it is God's will for me to serve my family through them."
So, although many days I may FEEL my job is insignificant, I KNOW that my purpose is RIGHT HERE at home, serving Him and my family through these "mundane" and "insignificant" tasks. And when thinking about it that way, those routine tasks and interruptions somehow turn into a mountain of OPPORTUNITIES.
Keep the faith Ash! These days won't last forever and someday you'll be laughing at these trivial things. Enjoy the best you can. Love, Kasie
ReplyDeletePraying for you and missed you tonight.
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