UPDATE...

Before I get into the specifics, here are 2 pictures of our sweet baby that we received a couple of days ago.. She is growing up.. and continues to get more and more beautiful with each passing day... I can't believe it's already been 2 1/2 months since we were holding her and loving on her. I could just jump right through that picture right now and kiss those chubby cheeks and kissable little lips.. And her hair!!  I can't believe how much it has grown :) 

OK...So as hard as I know this will be to type, it is theraputic for me and this is kind of my way of journaling my thoughts and emotions for Zoe to be able to read someday.  We have run into some roadblocks as far as getting the documents and information the US Embassy has requested.  Without going into the LONG version, some of the things the Embassy has requested involve sending someone to the region/village where Zoe's birthfamily lives to obtain the information.  Normally, this wouldn't be a HUGE deal, but the orphanage director (who would facilitate all of this) is out of the country right now and the roads (if they can even be called roads) leading to this area are impassable via car now due to the rainy season.  So last we heard, they have sent a WALKER to travel to obtain this information and relay it back to the orphanage, who will relay it back to our agency's director, who will then deliver it to the Embassy.  Obviously, this will take time and could cause us considerable delays.  We are also awaiting another document from a 3rd party before we can be re-submitted to the Embassy for further review.  But our God is bigger than any piece of paper and we are praying for Him to move in HUGE and MIGHTY ways like only HE can so that our Zoe can be home with her family soon. 

We know that God loves us and loves our Zoe and we know that He has plans to prosper us and not to harm us, but sometimes it's just soo hard to CONSISTENTLY trust in Him and His timing (especially for a type-A control freak like me!).  Our hearts just ache so badly for our baby and I wish I could say I've been strong and holding it together, but I often feel like I'm just an inch away from an emotional puddle of tears.  And I soo badly want to trust in His perfect timing.   But in the midst of struggling to give it to God and let go, I MISS MY BABY.  

The beauty in this is that I have become soo much more aware of how many people are loving us and our Zoe through this difficult time.  I am constantly amazed at the way God is using His children to minister to us in soo many ways.  Through many phone calls, texts, facebook messages, a package in the mail addressed to our Zoe with a handmade hairbow and note from a friend I have never met in person (thank you Sarah), many hugs, friends who listen and cry with me, so many new friends I have made since we started the adoption process, and soo much more...I am OVERWHELMED. Thank you. From the bottom of our hearts for loving us and praying for us.  Zoe has NO IDEA how much she is loved by people who have never even met her.  So to all of you who have felt led to reach out to us through this time, prayed for us and our Zoe, and allowed God to use you, please know that it means so much.  So often through this process, a phone call, visit, email, etc. have come at JUST the time I needed it most and I know that's not a coincidence. 

A couple of weeks ago, I entered a blog giveaway on the off chance that I would win (not something I do often). I love this blog and look forward to her posts and new creative ideas. They are also in the process of adopting from Ethiopia (for the 2nd time) and every month she does a giveaway to *celebrate* another month on the waiting list. This was their 9-month giveaway and oh how I hope they have a referral before they hit that 10-month mark! I'm not sure why I entered on this particular day. I usually don't because there are usually TONS of entries and I know my chances of winning are slim to none. Well, wouldn't you know that out of 457 entries, I WON. And this is what I won:

Yes, friends.  GOD IS IN THE DETAILS.  On a day when I was REALLY struggling and ready to give up hope, I won this canvas.  With the definition of hope on it (at the very bottom). NO COINCIDENCES.  And yes- this will be hanging on the wall in Zoe's room very soon.  We will have HOPE and trust in the ONE who can move mountains to bring our baby HOME. 

hope (verb):  to desire with expectation of fulfillment
hope (noun):  1. trust, reliance  2.  desire accompanied by expectation of fulfillment  3.  one that gives promise for the future